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Monday, April 28, 2014

15 Things to Expect When Married to a Police Officer

I came across this being shared on Facebook and thought it was sweet, but undeniably accurate!

15 things to expect when married to a police officer (by Molly McAdams):

1. Always having to sit a certain way at restaurants so he can see everything/everyone.
2. Always having to sit in the back row at a movie theatre -not to make out- but so he can see everyone.
3. If #1 or #2 are crowded, you will have to leave. Not because of the wait at the restaurant, or because someone might sit next to you at the theatre, but because crowds make him anxious beyond belief. Too much can go wrong.
4. When you're at the store, he will randomly shove you down an aisle and whisper, "Go that way" while he continues walking straight because he's just seen someone he arrested, and doesn't want them to see you.
5. If you eat fast food, you have to make sure not to go to certain ones for a few months because the last time you were there, the person at the window was someone he arrested.
6. Eventually someone delivering your pizza will have been arrested by your husband. (Thank God ours now views my husband like a role model, we're good.)
7. Because he is trained to drive a certain way if need be, he will drive like that in your personal car as well all the time, causing you to hold the "oh shit" bar the entire time while working on your imaginary braking skills.
8. When you hear velcro, you smile to yourself because you know your husband has made it home safe another day.
9. Not being able to buy him just any shirt you think will look good on him, because you have to buy him shirts that will cover his off-duty weapon.
10. Knowing where all the guns are in the house, if they're loaded or not, and getting scolded like a child if you're home alone and don't have one within reach.
11. Staring at your phone for the last 20 minutes of his shift, waiting for the phone call that says, "Gonna be late, have to transfer someone and do paperwork."
12. While at the beginning, hearing sirens used to make you hold your breath and pray until you heard from him again, you now just trust he'll come home, and whisper "Get some" to yourself with a smile when you hear sirens.
13. You can text/call him and not hear from him for hours because he's busy. But if he calls or texts you, you better answer or respond within seconds because he will lose his shit thinking something's happened to you, call you 10 times in a row, text you a dozen more, and will be on his way to your house to check on you … all within five minutes from the first text/call.
14. Hearing in detail the smell and look of a dead person no longer fazes you … it's normal conversation, just as guns, bullets, and differences in them are now a daily conversation.
15. Nothing shocks you anymore when it comes to illegal activity that he's seen at work. You just shake your head and say something along the lines of, "dumb ass" in regards to what happened, when during the first few months it was something along the lines of: "OH MY WORD!!! Are you serious?! What has happened to this world?! I can't believe that! Just -- WHAT!?"

So after all that, it also must be said that being a police officer's wife is the best thing in the world. Dinner conversations are never boring. He looks hot in his uniform. And you know he can protect you, and protects your city on a daily basis.

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